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13 Ways I Helped Heal Myself: A Birthday Reflection

By November 29, 2022No Comments

When I look back on 35, the greatest accomplishment was that I came home to myself. This was the year I fully healed myself from the fog of depression. I had been grappling privately, too ashamed to admit that I was in trouble for years.

I created this list in case you ever need it – the flat truth is none of us have come out unscathed from mental health struggles and it’s time we normalize it.

13 ways I Helped Myself Heal

1.) Courage helped me heal. Cutting the umbilical cord to LA & going full nomad all year created a seismic shift in what was possible. Being brave in the face of obstacles reunited me with a warrior inside and now I feel invincible.

2.) Community helped me heal. Co-living with strangers in Spain, Costa Rica & Guatemala was extraordinary. Relational intelligence is cultivated in dynamic relational interactions.

3.) Friendship helped me heal. My best friends of 25 years – those are my roots. Intergenerational friendships enriched my lens. New friends added novelty & adventure.

4.) Family helped me heal. This year we had honest conversations with grace and deep respect. Playing with my niece and nephew continues to be the greatest joy.

5.) Studying helped me heal. Learning from masters of trauma, relational intelligence, Tibetan Bon, Narrative Therapy and neuroscience both live and online has made me a better student and teacher of consilient thinking.

6.) Teaching has helped me heal. Speaking about hacking inspiration, storytelling, and human connection keeps me connected to what matters: using my voice to serve. There is nothing more rewarding than receiving a note that my work made a difference.

7.) Therapy/ meditation/ Breathwork helped me heal. Stilling my mind as a daily practice, processing pain in real time, and regulating my nervous system have become my foundational tool box for a healthy mind & spirit.

8.) A year without any substances helped me heal. The clarity provided by recognizing I don’t depend on any outer source for my joy or creativity has been revelatory.

9.) Creativity helped me heal. I started a new dinner “ Stories of the Self”, filmed my first podcast “ How To Touch Her” and reopened my book proposal all fueled by the urge to create.

10.) Consistency helped me heal. Weekly sessions with my editor made me feel like I wasn’t failing at writing, so long as I kept giving it my all consistently.

11.) Going off socials helped me heal. I took the summer off social media and felt so liberated, less anxious and more present.

12.) Nature helped me heal. Waking up and getting direct sunshine, earth under my toes, and swimming in the ocean became an essential start to the day.

13.) Perspective helped me heal. When my motherland of Ukraine was attacked, it shook me awake. I realized two things: if you are free, you must work to free others and if you have a voice, you must work to give others voice. When I understand that my worst day, was most people’s best day in Ukraine – I stopped complaining.

It’s been one hell of a journey back and I thank every single person who has helped pull me up.

I feel so lucky.

To be aliver than alive – I wish that for you all.